Self Belief

Now that  I am an official graduate and real life is all to REAL, the first thing on your mind is shit I need a job. Going from having a student loan and a part time job while a student to now having nothing is sickening. The thought of having to rely on other people is not one that you want to think about after having so much freedom.

So in my haze of sheer panic I applied for pretty much every job going – part time, full time, temp and permanent (you get the picture). Literally anything to be able to give me a bit of my independence back. The problem when you do this is that you actually forget what you applied for, and it all becomes a bit of mess.  For example, i got an email for a phone interview with Next (thinking it was for retail), nope! It was for a call center for the company, in an awkward location with not many hours. But hey! I got through to a trail, and at the time I was chuffed with it because I had not had any other interest.

However, a few days later I get an email from H&M (a company I lovee), and was invited to an interview for a permanent full time job. So I went along to the interview feeling confident and happy, and to not sound too big headed – i nailed it. We were chatting for ages, got along really well and there were no awkward silences, and it really felt like this was the job for me. But obviously you don’t hear back for two weeks, and aren’t actually guaranteed to get it. So the night before the trial for Next I was full of so many mixed emotions, I felt so amazingly about the H&M job but then had a sinking feeling of what if I don’t get it. I will be so disappointed. But, here is where I told myself – Emma you need to have some self belief, no one else is going to believe in you if you do not believe in yourself. You did all you could do, and if you aren’t enough for them then you will try somewhere else.

However what I had learnt was to seriously think before you apply for jobs, I rang up Next and cancelled the trial, as it was a waste of there time and mine as It was not right for me at all. For me this is no longer a part time University job, this is my life and my future so I need to find a job that I will love and progress in. So, even if I don’t get the job at H&M at least it has taught me that ideally I would like to work in fashion retail.  So even though I have all the self belief that I have got this job, I am also looking on the bright side of it in case I don’t.


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